Let's talk about Self-Care
✨Happy Sunday beauties! Welcome to my new blog. Here you’ll find updates and info on SVB and all things boudoir. But also some everyday life stuff. Stories, links to helpful articles, tips and more.
✨Today I want to talk about self-care. Besides booking your boudoir shoot, getting your hair and nails done, hitting the gym etc. what are some other simple ways that we can take better care of ourselves and show ourselves love?
✨How much time are you planning to devote to your self care in 2024? Have you even thought about it? What do you consider a reasonable amount of time per week? 10 minutes? An hour? A day?
✨I get it! Life can get crazy hectic and sometimes our responsibilities get overwhelming. We may feel like we're letting people down if we don't stay in grind mode and/or mom mode 24/7. But the truth is that you can't provide anything for anyone if you don't first make sure that YOU are taken care of. Our bodies have subtle little ways of reminding us when it's time to take a break, so do yourself and your loved ones a favor and don't ignore those signs!
✨What are your signals from your body that you need to pause and recharge your batteries? For me I clench my jaw and before I realize it I’ve given myself a lovely tension headache. So I recently decided to put reminders on my calendar a few times/day that say "relax your face Mama" and I'm now having way less headaches! It's little acts of self love like this that can help us get through our week but then what are you doing on your days off? Do you even really get any days off? How many of us spend most of our days off taking care of the people we love? It's a labor of love of course, but at some point our cup will run dry if we don't make sure we're taking the time to refill it.
✨What does the word “delegate” mean to you? Do you delegate at work? How about at home? Are you comfortable asking your partner, a colleague, friend or family member for help? If the answer is no then ask yourself why you’re holding back. It may be as simple as sitting down and having a heart to heart with someone about your needs. I think women especially get hung up on this idea that we’re supposed to have this super human ability to do it all. It’s impossible. This way of thinking can lead to burn out, mental breakdowns and even serious issues with your physical health.
❤️Take a look at your life and try to figure out about how much time you spend catering to other’s needs vs how much time you spend catering to your own needs. Write it down as a visual reminder then make some small changes and compare the results in a month or 2. You may find it surprising how easy it is to carve out some time in your busy schedule for yourself by making small adjustments and asking for help.
Some Ideas to Give Yourself More Self-Care Time
❤️ Do you spend your days off doing piles and piles of laundry? Have you every thought about bagging it up and dropping it off somewhere to give yourself some extra R&R time? If you're near Agawam, go see Trish at Community Laundry once or twice a month. She’s amazing! You’ll get your clothes fresh and neatly folded (she even separates mine from my daughters) within 48 hrs. But many laundromats offer this service, just call around.
❤️ Do you hate cleaning the house? Get it professionally cleaned once in a while. Doesn’t even have to be weekly. No, it's not something only boushy people do! Once a month or once every other month is enough to save you hours. There’s something so satisfying about looking at your environment all fresh and clean. Even if you just have a room or 2 cleaned it will take a huge load off your shoulders.
❤️ Have your groceries delivered or better yet, try a prepared meal delivery service.
❤️ Tell your partner you need them to help pick up the slack or or give you a day off. Have them drive the kids to or pick them up from activities. Have them help with homework or even just go play outside with them for an hour. Communicate with your partner about your self-care needs.
❤️ Ask your kid’s friend’s parents if they’d be willing to do a childcare exchange arrangement. **obviously only do this if you know and trust them.
❤️ Ask a trusted family member if you can drop the kids off for a sleepover with them.
❤️ Go on to sittercity.com or check your local town forum for babysitters. There’s so many teens who would love to earn a few extra bucks. Babysitting was my first job and I absolutely LOVED getting paid to play with some cute kiddos! In fact I loved it so much that I went on to be a professional Nanny for 10 years! And spending time with older kids is a great way for your children to learn and grow. My daughter’s favorite sitter is 15 and she now looks up to her almost as a big sister. It’s adorable and great for her since she’s an only child.
❤️ This one was the hardest for me to overcome because I have OCD…LEAVE the mess! Yep. It’s fine! No one is judging your messy house and if they are then what are they even doing in your house? I’m not saying let it pile up for months but those few dishes, that pile of toys or laundry should not take precedence over your mental wellbeing.
❤️A lot of you probably already do this but if not, it’s perfectly OK to ask your kids and anyone else who lives in your home to help out! For the littles, get them a chore chart. Reward them for doing things around the house. Even the itty bitty ones. Get them in the routine of picking up after themselves and they’ll become more productive and better organized as they grow.
✨Some of these are 100% free and pretty simple life adjustments but for the ones that aren’t I know what you’re thinking…"those are luxuries" I can’t spend money on that…my kids need xyz...! But are they really “luxuries”? Does your kid really need the MOST expensive pair of shoes? What other areas can you tweak your budget? When I decided to make these changes, I realized I had a ton of little subscriptions to online services that I barely used! Cutting those out gave me the funds I needed to treat myself to some of the things listed above once in a while. Teaching my almost 7 year old to do the dishes and put her own laundry away freed up even more of my time.
✨The way I see it, self care is self maintenance. You go through the car wash and you get your oil changed right? Without regular maintenance what happens to your car? Our bodies are machines too. Tweaking your budget or your routine to do even one time saving thing like those listed above a few times per month is such a simple act of self love that will keep your motor running smoothly.
✨You work hard and you deserve those few extra hours to spend refilling your own cup so that you can put your best foot forward in your home and your career life. The work will wait and your kiddos will be fine with someone else for a few hours. Even just sending them to play (or better yet clean) in their rooms for a while will give you a chance to reboot. Today is a great day to ask your partner or another adult to take the kids out in the snow so that you can curl up with your favorite book or take a long bath. DO NOT FEEL GUILTY about it. Just straight up tell them “mommy (or daddy) needs a break”! They will still love you I promise! Make a habit of it. Let it become a MUST in your weekly routine! I recommend choosing one day per week (my day is usually Sunday) that you devote at least a decent part of the day to pampering yourself. Leave the dishes in the sink or better yet ask someone else to do them! Turn the work phone off. Close the laptop and put it away. A beautiful snowy winter day like this is the perfect opportunity to enjoy some much needed R&R. Start right now! What can you do for yourself TODAY?